Tuesday 22 March 2016

Wibble Wobble!

So that time is approaching. The moment I'm dreading. The moment it all becomes too real.

I'm going to have to start writing the 'book' soon.

I'm about one planning session away from being ready. I know what will happen and in what order. I know my characters pretty well - they are bound to surprise me at some point. I've plotted out the 'book' so I know I can dive in and write any scene at any stage - to stop me losing focus and keep everything fresh.

So why am I wobbling? I've done everything I can to make this happen. I'm on top of it and ready. Yet I'm doing the serious wobbly dance - just be glad you can't see me!

It's the old self esteem thing again. My doubts have taken on gigantic proportions, in fact I'm starting to think I need to look out the old knight in shining armour costume and go all Beowulf on them.

I've written here many times about how I struggle to think of myself as a writer. I think that's where the wobbles come from. My self doubt. I know what you're all thinking - here she goes again! But I'm not just looking for sympathy, for hand holding or an ego boost. I'm slowly coming round to thinking that maybe I can do this writing thing.

Wobble, wobble! What if when it comes down to it I can't do it? What if all this planning is for nothing? What if I get as far as 10,000 words and the thing runs out of steam like all my other attempts?

So here I sit, wobbling, with a notebook full of plans. Here's hoping I can pull myself together and get it sorted before I start the actual task of writing.

Just call me The Jelly Writer... wobble, wobble!

11 comments:

  1. It sounds like you've done everything you can to make sure you don't run out of steam. And you won't! I have faith in you, and we're all here to support you and keep you going :)

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    1. Thanks Sara! I certainly feel as ready as I'll ever be so time to get on with it now ... I may call on that support too!

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  2. You've done so much already, that's a great achievement, just go for it!

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    1. I've certainly done more prep for this than anything I've tried before so I guess all that's left is to get down to it.

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  3. That's make a good pen name in fact! Seriously though, I hope you're done wobbling now and good luck :) #whatimwriting

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    1. Wobbling over now, Carol. Now the best part - writing! Fingers crossed I'm ok and no more wobbles.

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  4. You know what the very best thing about getting on and writing is? It's that you can then, unequivocally, call yourself a writer! Totally get the wobbles though. I hope they settle down enough for you to get started soon. And if not? Just do it anyway :) x

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    1. I'm trying the term 'writer' out in my head but it has yet to pass my lips! Maybe soon ...

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  5. Ah ha! You called yourself a writer! Ok it it was prefixed with 'jelly' but still, I'm taking it as a win for our team and especially you! Of course you can do this! See you at camp xx

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    1. Thanks Maddy, that one slipped away from me! Looking forward to camp - sleeping bag airing as we speak...

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  6. You can absolutely do it! It's just the last hurdle of that first blank page!

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