Today I was reading a post by Maddy over at http://writingbubble.co.uk/somethings-gotta-give which really struck a chord with me. In fact I could have written most of it myself!
Like Maddy I have been struggling to stay focused on my writing. I have written very little this week. My novel is gathering dust on the hard drive and I'm struggling to find the motivation to start writing it again. I've fallen behind with the online writing course and have a short story to write with no ideas. I've even fallen out of love with my writing journal, leaving it untouched for a week.
So what's the problem? It's not even as simple as writer's block. It's just a feeling of ennui, of not having the impetus to pick up a pen or open a Word doc. I don't really know how to describe it, I'm just not feeling the writing vibe at the moment.
Now I know that it will pass and I'll get going again. But it's not a nice feeling when I've finally plucked up the courage to describe myself as a writer, albeit in a whisper. I should be buzzing with ideas, itching to get my stories out of my head and onto paper but I'm not. In fact most of the time writing is the furthest thing from my mind. I know that I should sit down and just do some writing, whatever it may be. That's the advice I always get and it's good advice. After all, if I'm a writer I should just do some writing, yeah? But when nothing comes, it's hard; it feels like a real failure and I'd rather not try so I don't fail.
I feel like I'm going round in circles with this and that's not helpful. In fact I feel as if all the analysing is counterproductive, just churning stuff about and not getting anywhere is frustrating.
Luckily I have a weeks break coming up which I hope will get my writing juices flowing again. In fact, this blog post is the most I've written for ages! How sad is that? So let's stop picking at this and worrying it; let's calm down and write something, anything to prove that I still can.